This post is one I have struggled to write. I have started and stopped so many times majorly because I'm currently in a phase where life’s pressure has been hitting me a little too hard, I couldn't find my wit or the energy to write from the angle where I can successfully convince you guys that I face my challenges head-on and kick them in the butt (so pardon me if this post isn't as witty as usual).  Trust me when I say nothing has been funny these past few weeks.

The mind has its way of playing tricks on you and letting you believe that you're far behind where you ought to be. Allowing your emotions to take the lead may a lot of times (if not all the time) hinder you from making any real progress.  So, I decided to reach out to a few people I know because I needed a little reassurance and some real talk. Here’s what they had to say;

•  Kobi – I pray and take each day as it comes. I believe that my response to situations stems from my mind, so whenever I feel pressured, I take a step back to analyze what I have been feeding my mind with. I do this because I know when I feed myself with the right things I am not swayed by life’s pressures or what other people have going on.
• Uju – I cry o, plenty tears. I allow myself to feel all that needs to be felt and when I’m done, I face my pressures with a mindset that knows and believes that life is in seasons and my time will definitely come. No matter the rain, sun go still shine.
• Sherry – I take life one day at a time, draw up my itinerary and go about my day. There’s only one life and it’s important to live it with a positive mindset.
• Tomi- First off, I’m a doctor. My job gives me little or no time to feel pressured from life or watching people forge ahead.  But jokes aside, I pretty much remind myself that I’m on my own path and with it comes different routes and complexities. This mindset helps me get rid of these pressures when they come, with a lot of sleep of course lol.
• Tobi – I tend to withdraw from things and people around me. I cry, if need be, have a stiff drink, take it slow and face my challenges head on.
• Molade – I realized that a lot of my pressures come from me comparing my life with someone else’s and I woke up one day and decided that I would turn my worries into gratitude. I know where I’m coming from, and I remember that I once prayed for everything I have now. I focus on myself and making the most of my life doing the things I love and things that make me happy. All of these keeps me grounded and I am reminded that everything will be perfected in its time and I’m not behind, I’m right where I need to be.
• Adeoye – Most of the time pressure is internal, we as individuals put this pressure on ourselves and in my opinion, the only way to deal with it is to not put that pressure on yourself. It usually stems from getting older and realizing you have not checked out certain goals and dreams. My advice, you have to remind yourself that your race & journey is unique, and you are on the right track (that is of course if you have been putting in the work to get all that you desire). You remind yourself how far you have come. It doesn’t matter what other people might have done at your age, you did not start out the same way as them and you certainly do not have the same story. Focus on your journey and take it one step at a time.
• Omolola - Well, to be honest I don't feel pressured about peers who seem to be moving ahead because I'm aware that we are on different journeys and our destinations are also different. I've seen and I know what the Lord has planned for me as regards my next step and moving ahead. So as against feeling pressured, I'm stewarding the promise till the Kairos moment of manifestation by following the voice of the Holy Spirit in carrying out little assignments that come up on the way diligently and being present and discerning so I don't miss my moment.
• Ayodeji - I have come to understand that the difference between me and the people that forge ahead is effort. Nobody really has it easy (even though sometimes it looks easy) but being willing to put in an extra effort - in ordinary things, on days when you are tired or feel discouraged - is a way to stay motivated. Another thing is realizing that when pressure comes and life feels overwhelming, I need to breathe, smile, and try to articulate reasons why I am overwhelmed. It’s ok to take a break, but don’t give up. It’s ok to have fluctuating energies on some days. Acknowledge it and don’t beat yourself up on the days when your energy is low. Rather save your energy, gather momentum, and go again. One more thing, I believe that life is  a series of individual races, with each person on their own track. So, it's expected that we won't all arrive at the same destination. If someone is forging ahead today, I sincerely cheer them on and wish them well. Their progress doesn't dampen my spirits, instead I remain confident that my time will come.
• Korede -I remember that I am not them and they are not me. There are good things I have they don’t have. There are bad things they have I don’t have. I also believe they must have done stuff to get that. I ask myself if I am ready to put in the work to reach and surpass greater heights and I make a choice and focus on all I need to do get there. I also tend to reach out to close friends and family for some encouragement. We all need a good support system.
• Esther - So, being an adult is hard normally and it’s even harder when you have expectations of yourself or ideas of where you think you should be, and you haven’t met these expectations. How I deal with it is to reduce the pressure I put on myself and constantly remind myself that I’m doing the best I can do and there are so many things that are out of my control. I focus on the things I can control and do them to the best of my abilities. Also, with seeing people forge ahead, I try to remind myself that everyone’s path is different, and things happen for everyone differently. I try to also practice gratitude too because when you’re focusing on others, you lose sight of the things that are actually going well for you. I try to count my blessings as often as possible. Also, God, I try to pray and focus on Him too.
• Yemisi- Staying still. Whenever I feel myself getting pressured, I take some alone time to gather my thoughts and recharge, I choose to isolate myself from distractions and the outside world by sleeping & resting. It helps me find clarity and regain focus. I do not feel pressured by seeing people forge ahead, if anything I’m inspired because it gives me hope that there’s more out there waiting for me. One tip to staying levelheaded is that I plug into communities where I can find resourceful help, information & guidance.
• Theresa – Me vs me...that's what comes to mind when I think of pressure! I know that the world puts enough pressure on me and that I don't have to choose to add more. Alas, it can't be helped as I'm truly a person who has always envisaged myself thriving. When I have felt extremely low, I remind myself that I'm not in a race against any opponents, and the pressure I put on myself can start to drag me down if I let it. I always say to myself that my life is not a race, it’s a journey. The route I take is life itself, and my navigation system is my mind. However, my mind continually tends to make me stop from time to time and dwell in a place of worry. Being in that place of worry is always dark and devastating! I camp there a while just pondering about how to continue until God shines a light towards a sign that says 'Hope, This way' and another that says 'Keep going'. I see these signs in many ways but mostly in the faces of my children and feel instantly encouraged. So, I try to channel my self-inflicted pressure into motivation. I make a plan or set goals, even if they aren't big ones, and when I achieve them, I reward myself. Because life is short, so I choose to let myself be happy and keep going forward knowing that the things I want in life are coming to me.
• Yinka – While we can all agree that life comes with a lot of pressure, whether it’s from work, friends, family and a lot of times, personal pressure. It is important to set a goal for yourself and work towards achieving it but ensure to do it at your own pace. I’m not going to deny that I don’t feel pressured sometimes, but this is what has always helped. It’s safe to say I turn my pressures into motivations. Another important thing is to be utterly honest with yourself even with the truths you do not want to hear. I am a strong believer of the popular saying “there is always light at the end of the tunnel”. So, pace yourself, take it one step at a time. And this right here is my tip to maintaining a steady head.

After reading all that my friends had to say, I realized one thing they were all saying- Everyone has their unique journeys and if you hang in there long enough you will reach your full potential. I appreciate you guys a lot for sharing. 

Another thing you can try is to take a personality test as it may help you understand your temperament and how you can tackle challenges. But bear in mind that all these is based off someone else’s intensive analysis and observation of human behavior, it is not a total representation of who you are. Here are a few links to some tests I took recently.

https://www.truity.com/test/type-finder-personality-test-new

https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/temperament-test

https://openpsychometrics.org/tests/O4TS/

My posts are therapy for me, and I hope that they are therapy for anyone else on a similar journey. One thing I know and believe is that the lines will fall in pleasant places if you stay true to yourself. It’s okay if you weren’t able to achieve all that you desired in the previous year, we go again! We keep going until we achieve all that we are. But don’t forget to water yourself, give yourself time to stop, rejuvenate and keep going again. I saw a post recently that said we keep going because we believe if we show up every single day, there’s a chance that something might change. And that in itself is the absolute truth.

I'm going to wrap this up with a quote from a video that I love so much by one of the greatest poets of all time - Speed Darlington 'If I don't laugh, I'll cry, so it's better I laugh even if I have to force it'. Staying down does not fix your situation, so chin up and laugh from the bottom of your heart, it's all working out for your good.

Here’s to a year of unimaginable possibilities and endless opportunities. The world is your oyster so go out there and soar!